Friday, January 16, 2009

the difference

Years ago, before the oldest kids got old enough to be of much help, I was up to my eyeballs in children, dishes, laundry, diapers, etc. I just wanted to run away from home all by myself. It was during one of those really tight financial times and I knew there was just no way we could afford it. The fact that I knew I couldn't seemed to make the want to get away seem that much more frustrating.
I finally talked with my dear husband and let out all of my feelilngs and frustrations, etc. He told me that somehow he would find a way for me to get away. I was stunned. I was so caught up in the I cant of the situation, it never dawned on me that there might be a way. I was so appreciative that he would do that for me.
Once I knew that I really could go somewhere, all of the frustration seemed to melt away. As I sat and thought and thought about where I could go, it finally dawned on me. There really wasn't anywhere that I really wanted to go. The fact that I could just seemed to make all of the difference.
How thankful I am for a good husband who was willing to do whatever it took to let me get away.
Again, now our situation is different. All of the children are grown and gone. I can go anywhere I want. What I really want is to be home with my favorite person, doing nothing special, just being together. Some things stay the same. Just knowing I could if I wanted to makes the difference.

Sunday, January 4, 2009

new look

thanks Misty for the new look. We worked on the first one that had the cars. I was across the room and saw it and thought it was cute but after we added it, we figured it had looked cuter from across the room. It was bright and colorful but not quite what I had in mind. then the blog wouldn't let her change it. So to do my blog designer justice, I wanted to let everyone who saw it know that I picked it.
When I got home from church she had taken pity on me and changed out the cars. thanks Misty. When you only have one foot in the new technology it helps to have tech support in the family and free.

Saturday, January 3, 2009

such a special gift

When I was growing up, we had limited space and funds for decorating for Christmas. We usually got a very small tree that would sit on a table and my mothers favorite colors were blue lights and blue bulbs.
I yearned for a big tree with all the colors possible.
One year at school, my teacher let me have the classroom tree and I dragged it all the way home. It must not have been too great because other than dragging it home, I really don't remember much else.
I dreamed and yearned for a big tree with lots and lots and lots of lights and color.
When I got married, we still had limited funds and space so we started out with a medium tree and some lights and a few ornaments. As the kids came along and got in school and primary, we began to get more and more ornaments of every size, shape and color.
We had real trees for awhile but it really got messy so we went to artificial. It was still somewhat ho hum but the day finally came when I found my dream tree on sale. I loved it. It takes awhile to set up and take down because it is so full and has so many branches. I even ended up taking the bottom layer of branches off because you couldn't get presents under it.
It has held up really well through the years and has filled my dream of a big tree.
Some may think it isn't all that big, but to me it is big and beautiful.
As the kids grew up and left home it got harder and harder to think about setting it up. We even put up a little tree one year and it was such a flop. When our daughter came up with the idea to decorate the tree for us, it was great. Now I had a reason to put up the big tree again.
This year was so special. We gals of the family get together once a week to do gardening or crafts or whatever. I took advantage of my week and asked them to set up the tree. They had it set up in no time. I tweeked a few of the branches and then three of the grandkids came over and put on the lights and decorations. It was wonderful.
I had my favorite tree, enough lights for three trees and wonderful ornaments covering it from top to bottom.
Next year another family takes a turn to decorate the tree.
As I took the tree down this year and sent thank you's to those who helped put it up and decorated it, I thought to myself. If there hadn't been a single present under the tree, the sweet service from our family through the years to set it up and to decorate it with precious ornaments of their making was a wonderful gift in itself.
How I love my tree and my family who make it so special each year.

Thursday, January 1, 2009

the blessings of motherhood

As I read the blogs of my daughters and daughters in law about their concerns of having another child, I pondered a special blessing given years ago before the ability to again have children had been restored to me.
We had two children at the time but one was very ill and doctors weren't sure if he would live past 5.
Having found the gospel and the significance of eternal families, my heart ached at the lost ability to have children. At that time, any surgery to restore that ability was very difficult and the results were extremely slim that it would be successful.
A very special blessing was received that reassured me that in fact the blessing to have children would be restored.
The restored health of the one was also given in another special blesssing by his father and uncle.
What joy filled my heart at the great love of a Heavenly Father to make a way for the great blessing of continued motherhood to be restored in such a miraculous way.
If that ability was to be restored, then so should the ability to raise and nurture those blessed children that would come.
I have never doubted that blessing, nor the strength that came when needed with each new addition to our family. The ability to love was always there, the strength was given when needed and the joy was felt and gratitude abounded with each child.
Now at this season of my life, I continue to marvel at the continuation of that blessing with the birth of each child to the miracle children that I was blessed with.
Of the one that was not supposed to live, there are now four children. Of the one who was not supposed to be able to have children, there are three. Another has four, one has two, one has three, one has one and another on the way, and one will, I am sure, be blessed in the future.
From that great blessing long ago there has been six added to the two and from those 8 have come 17.
Never doubt in your ability to love, care and raise up children to the Lord. You will be guided, directed and blessed in all your efforts. On your own, there could be shortcomings but with the Lord on your side, for every trial, there will be solutions and answers, strength and joy.
If He has the confidence in you to send you a child, then with that ability will also come all you will need to love and raise it, of that I can testify.